Where is the time going? It's exactly 2 weeks until Christmas and I have been so busy celebrating the holiday that I have missed it. AGGGH! I don't know why but this year the season has hit hyper speed. Where is it going?
Last night I had an ornament exchange with some old friends - six years running - great ladies. Everyone brings a sweet or a savory dish. Every single lady brought a sweet. Thankfully, I put out some hummus and chips - something to cut the sweet. I powered through four sweets and two glasses of white wine in about four minutes and lived to regret it the rest of the evening. What's worse is that none of it tasted that good to me. It was all a little too much. (this does not mean that it was not well made - just wasn't what I wanted) It has just been six weeks but my tastes have changed.
The question remains - why did I still eat it? When I was eating it and it wasn't tasting that good to me and I knew I'd feel bad later - why did I still eat it? I thought about this more after talking to my friend Whitney this morning. I was trying to please people. These ladies are all stay at home moms now and they were all so excited to be out and to bring their fun baked goods to someone else. I ate them because I wanted everyone to feel ok with what they brought. I didn't want anyone to feel like I favored one person's goodie over another. I was able to say no to the storebought pie because she didn't make it.
Isn't that bizarre? I do it when I go home, too. My Mom will make something and I don't want to let her down so I eat it...even if it isn't what I want in the moment. My Dad makes great eggs and pancakes but sometimes I don't want that for breakfast - but I eat them anyway. They taste good. I enjoy it. Still, I know I was eating it to please someone. In that moment, I say no to myself and yes to someone else.
Don't get me wrong, there are times when it is good and right to focus on others over ourselves...I'm just not sure this is an area where it's wise to do so. The funny thing is that no one would have cared three minutes later if I ate their baked good. They were happy to hear I enjoyed it and got a momentary lift but they honestly would have been just fine if I said, "You know, I am not craving sweets right now - I really want some hummus."
This is a great lesson and a muscle I am going to try to flex this season. Here's to new learning experiences!
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I am the same. exact. way. I have a hard time telling people "No" when they cook for me. You should just put them on your plate and say you are saving them for later and just toss them. Is that rude? :) My co-workers are the same way about pushing food on folks and also about spending all morning planning out where we are going for lunch. Especially on Fridays. It's hard to break a cycle that you helped create for so long. Maybe next year you can change the rules of the gift exchange and make it healthified dishes or do a soup and salad dinner that night. OR BETTER YET (I am so full of ideas right now! :) Do like a create your own salad buffet. Like have people bring toppings - shrimp, chicken, steak, cheeses, cranberries, nuts, etc so you can build your own. And the host can provide the salad? Okay I'm hungry right now. Sorry this comment has taken a life of it's own.
ReplyDeletei think this is normal. i found myself doing this on thanksgiving at my sis-in-law's house. she made so many things i wouldn't have normally ate, but i put a little of each on my plate just to show i wasn't a big jerk. i even took some stuffing which everyone who knows me, knows i'm not a fan. i tasted it, knew it wasn't for me, and moved on to the next thing. i think it's just human nature to be polite and not decline things for fear of coming off rude.
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